Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?
If the mood takes us, we sometimes (read: basically never) write in-depth guides to games. Thing is, guides take an enormous amount of effort and time to put together. We don't half-ass them, because if we care enough to make a guide, it's gonna be a guide for a game we truly love. 'cept when Shepton used to make collectible guides for Call of Duty or Uncharted or whatever. That was just clickbait.